Dogs Don't Understand Diets

OINK! Our doggie Cocoa Puffs has been pigging of late, much to our chagrin. Last visit to the vet we were told she needs to lose a few pounds and best not gain any more. So we cut back a bit on her food. But she's still getting into snarf-fests when we accidentally leave anything resembling food in the kitchen when we're gone. It's the only room in the house that's easy to close off with baby gates, so we keep her in there when we are gone. She has her cushy floor pillow, a toy with some snacks in it, a water bowl, more toys to chew on--everything a dog could want. Except dogs always want more to eat. We have to be careful to take the trash can out of the kitchen and sometimes we forget. And anything in reach that contains food. She particularly likes to pull down tupperware from off the sink and lick it clean before it makes its way into the dishwasher. So today as I was leaving for my job interview (Library Job #3 I've intereviewed for), I made sure to get all the tupperware off the sink and out of reach. But I neglected to notice the sealed tupperware on the table containing yummy butterscotch bars that J. made a few nights ago...When I got home, empty chewed up tupperware on the floor, guilty-looking dog on the pillow. Ack!!! And I really wanted one of those bars!! And she ate them all! Piggee! Dammit. She has this look on her face like she knows she shouldn'ta done it...and feels very bad about it (but will do it again given the opportunity).

I'm not sure if this is better or worse, but yesterday she ate my bar of face soap. Stole it right out of the tub while I was in the other room. I couldn't believe it, a whole bar of soap! I called the vet and they said she might have some GI problems, which in English means barf or diarrhea. She had neither. Didn't even look like she had a tummy ache. Not phased in the least. I kept hoping she might open her mouth and have soap bubbles come out, like in the old Little Rascals cartoons, but no dice. She did have lovely-smelling breath for a few hours... I'm not sure how many calories a bar of soap is, but the butterscotch bars were probably a lot more than the soap.